jellymccrank:

My son (age 4) needs to get his hair cut. He doesn’t want me to comb or brush it and he can’t quite coordinate doing it himself. He doesnt want me getting anywhere near him with scissors or clippers either. It’s becoming quite unmanageable and I’m worried that it’ll get tangled to the point that it’ll become a sensory problem. Any advice?

will he let you take out tangles with your fingers?  This is a bit of a time-consuming solution, but might help keep the tangles from getting too bad while you try to figure out a more permanent solution.  (When my son had long hair, I would alternate brushing with finger-detangling if the tangles were sufficiently large.)  Satin pillowcases also allow hair to slide around instead of tangling while he’s asleep.

Some children at 4 are able to hold up their end of conversations about things like this.  If you phrase it as a “if we cannot do brushing, we will NEED to do cutting” kind of thing, is that something he can respond to/ make a choice between?

Can he tell you the reasons he doesn’t want brushing and cutting?  if they’re things like “the brush feels weird on my head,” that might be fixable with a different style of brush.  if it’s “the clippers are really loud,” maybe ear guards?  (you’d have to move them around to cut the hair near his ears, but it’s a start?)  Scissors are scary for a lot of children this age, both neurotypical and non – stories about hair-salon tantrums are practically a trope.

Also, maybe get him a long-haired doll to practice brushing on?  It’d be easier to practice brushing in front of his head before trying to do it on top of his head…