shakesankle:

Okay can we talk about Mercutio and Benvolio for a minute please?

Mercutio does not actually die on-stage. He is stabbed by Tybalt, makes a few puns and the odd dick joke (as one would), and then asks Benvolio to help him “into some house”. They go off-stage and Benvolio re-enters a few lines later (suspiciously few, in fact) to report Mercutio’s death.

Benvolio himself then promptly disappears from the play at the end of the scene.

Headcanon that Mercutio’s death was faked and that he and Benvolio are sitting happily on some tropical island together, sipping cocktails and making out.

geekhyena:

klondikeaura:

citizen-zero:

So in lore, vampires have this trait that I’ve almost never seen used, and that’s the fact that vampires are OBSESSED with counting things. Like, the Count on Sesame Street was almost certainly created specifically as a vampire because of this piece of lore.

Like, I read this vampire book years and years ago that explained that a surefire way to protect yourself from vampires getting into your house was to spread a ton of seeds on your doorstep–poppy and mustard seeds were particularly recommended for the purpose. Basically, if you suspected someone to be a vampire, all you had to do was drop a sackful of seeds on the ground in front of them.

If they didn’t immediately start counting them, they were not a vampire. However, if they WERE a vampire, they’d be seized with the urge to count all the seeds and they would not budge from that spot until they knew how many seeds there were in total. The point was to keep them there until the sun came up and killed them, because if they hadn’t counted all the seeds by sunrise they wouldn’t be able to leave. Presumably you could just go about the rest of your evening as normal, though no word on whether it’s possible to make them lose count and start over.

Having remembered this piece of lore, I want fewer stories about brooding tortured Edward Cullen-esque vampires. I want to start seeing more stories about math nerd vampires.

Vampire accountants who are an honest company’s best asset and a corrupt company’s bane because they are frighteningly accurate with the accounts and will not hesitate to blow the whistle on a CEO scamming money because fuck you for making the numbers wrong.

Vampire cashiers that don’t need to look at the register screen because they already mentally calculated your total. 10-items-or-less vampires who know goddamn well you have 20 items in that basket and NO, you cannot just slip in with the rest.

Vampire math tutors who are constantly in high demand and have to hold lotteries to see who gets to be tutored by them.

MATH NERD VAMPIRES

If anyone would like the term for this, it’s arithmomania.

https://www.amazon.com/Utterly-Uninteresting-Unadventurous-Vampire-Accountant-ebook/dp/B00M6AM6Q8

dduane:

daughter-of-ophelia:

whoopsrobots:

Okay so you know those poofy old timey renaissance pants that looked totally ridiculous?

Well in my history of fashion class we learned that the bright stripes are called slashes, and are actual slashes in the outer layer that mimic slashes from swordfighting, and they were added as a stylistic flair to make it look like the men had been in battle.

Guys.

Distressed Jeans aren’t just ‘our generation’

Absolutely.

Most to the point: this could get to be an incredibly expensive form of detailing. People slashed doublets and pantaloons in all kinds of rare and pricey fabrics.

There’s this too: slashing (in some jurisdictions) was a way to exploit loopholes in the local sumptuary laws. Until the powers that be got off their butts and actually amended the existing laws to forbid slashing with what they considered over-expensive fabrics that common folks shouldn’t be allowed to wear, you got to wear them – with a little extra frisson of being just that far away from breaking the law – and get away with that year’s hot fashion statement.

(For reference purposes, look at some of the articles linked to at the bottom of this page on Elizabethan sumptuary law. The title “Controlling the uncontrollable” is very much to the point. Morality-based or politically-based legislation against fashion trends rarely turns out well…)

Here’s Anne of Austria with fashionably slashed sleeves.

image

See also this page (source of the image above) for more examples. Google will show you lots more if you go looking. One could slash very subtly or very extravagantly: there was a wide range of possibilities, depending on your rank / station and how punk you felt like looking…

Hi, I was wondering if you are taking requests? If not, then please ignore this, or sit on it for a while and decide. Tom did not build her up from nothing; he broke down the walls around what she didn’t want to acknowledge. The book that housed a fraction of soul looked into this lonely, angry child and for just a moment saw a shadow of himself. Or basically: What if, Ginny was sorted into Slytherin?

ink-splotch:

Hm. So you seem to be asking two different questions here, and you don’t seem to know that they’re different. They’re both interesting stories probably, but I think what I’d like to talk to you about here is that nonequivalence. 

You’ve asked for a dark!Ginny, one who secretly hates, who secretly relishes in pain or dismissal, one with a hidden superiority complex and a violence in her that’s cruel enough to match a young, arrogant Tom Riddle. The youngest of seven, forgotten and left behind, belittled, bitter, and the orphaned boy who orphaned so many more in his time. 

It’s not quite my type of story, that–my Ginny is not a kind beast, but she is not a cruel one either–but it could certainly be a story. 

But then–

Or basically: What if, Ginny was sorted into Slytherin?

This is not the same question. Did you know that? 

Slytherin, despite everything, does not mean evil. It certainly doesn’t mean that on my blog, but even in canon– this is where you find Regulus Black, who died to stop old Tom. This is where you find Draco Malfoy, who was an ignorant, whiny, and self-important child, but hardly an evil one. This is where you find Andromeda Tonks, who loved so hard and so fierce and so well that she ran from superiority, wealth, and family to marry into a Mudblood house that was so much warmer than her childhood home ever had been. 

And Slytherin!Ginny is a story that would fascinate me. The traits of Slytherin– ambition, cunning, adaptability, selfishness, and possessive love– these sit well on the youngest Weasley. She falls in love with Harry day one and never gives up on it. She transforms herself to step out from waiting in the eaves for him and lives for her own self, and it’s that bright creation of her daring self that wins him in the end. She goes after things with a single-mindedness that delivers– in love, in Quidditch, in kissing boys and defending Hogwarts until the end. She breaks rules. She loves hard. She doesn’t give up. She belongs in Gryffindor, sure– bravery is a watchword; her red hair is a war banner– but she would not be out of place in Slytherin. 

And what a story that would be? The silence in the Great Hall when the name “Weasley” got followed by “SLYTHERIN.” Mrs. Weasley’s face when owls flap through the Burrow’s windows, carrying Percy’s concerned note and Ron’s dubious scrawl and Hermione’s anxious ‘Dear Mrs. and Mr. Weasley, I’d thought you’d like to be informed…’ (Fred and George of course just laughed and laughed and laughed into the silence and fell off their bench at the Gryffindor table and got bruises on their bums.) The way the Weasley parents would stress and wonder and pace and ask what did we do wrong– but in the end, the warm Weasley Christmas sweater that would arrive in the mail at the Slytherin table, a G knitted into the front, all brilliant in silver and green. 

But the worries Ginny would have that first year, as the diary ate her from the inside, as it did cruel things with her hands–she’d have the same fears that are written up there in that ask as certainties: that being Slytherin meant she was secretly wrong. That her loneliness and her anger, her ambition and all her little selfishnesses meant she walked in the same skin as Tom, the ghost-boy who was using her hands to strangle chickens and write threats and hang cats by their tails and let out monsters so they could murder schoolchildren for the sake of their blood. She would worry she was like him and she would be wrong. 

But this is what I would want out of that story– that growth, that realization, that reclaiming. You can be lonely without lashing out. You can be angry without being cruel. You can be ambitious without stepping on other people to get there. Ginny is good– a Ginny with green on her herms is still good. She is sarcastic and a bit dark in her humor, casts a mean Bat Bogey and is jealous about Cho and fiercely defensive of Luna– this is true in a lion’s House or a snake’s. 

I want Fred and George playing Exploding Snap with her and teasing her for not cheering for them in Quidditch matches. I want her to find Millicent’s temper as hilarious as she finds Luna’s oddities, and to threaten a hex on anybody who calls Millicent fatty just as quick as she threatens the ones who call Luna loony. I want Harry to conscript her to help him spy on Draco and her to take to espionage like a duck to water– because you’re a Slytherin, he says, and she laughs and says, no, because I’m a nosy little sister and always have been. 

When Ginny stays her sixth year, during the Carrows’ reign and Voldemort’s months of power, I’d want her to spit cruel words at Death Eaters and to hide her wand up her sleeve, and to stand between children and their abusers. I’d want her to marshal an army in the Room of Requirement, with Luna and Neville and every other scared, willing soul. This was her home. These were her people, her family, the things she was willing to fight for. 

When they told her–their firebrand, their war banner–that she ought to have been in Gryffindor, I hope she laughed, I hope she fumed, I hope she proved them wrong. She was here for her friends, the way Regulus betrayed Voldemort for Kreacher, the way Narcissa lied to save Draco, the way Snape spent his adult life atoning for Lily, the way Andromeda left everything behind for Ted Tonks. 

I would want Ginny to wear green proud by the end of it. I’d want her to know the evil was in Tom’s shadow, not in her, not in the color they both wore. I’d want Hermione to look up histories for her of Slytherins who saved children and fought good wars and taught and loved and built things meant to last– because ambition is about going after what you want. What in that is evil? Selfishness is about understanding that you yourself have value. What in that is evil? Cunning is about creativity, quick-thinking, rolling with the punches and paying attention– what in that is evil?

Do you know the sort of evil you can do in the name of fairness? Do you know the sort of damage you can do with bravery, with not knowing how to back down, not knowing how sometimes there is a need to give, to adapt? Do you know how you can cut with cleverness, what sort of scornful superiority can live in those high towers? 

These are stories about choice. You choose your House. You choose how to live your House. Be brave, be cunning, be fair, be curious– all of those have their dark wizards. I refuse to believe otherwise. 

jezunya:

acrippledcompilation:

chasingtheskyline:

underhuntressmoon:

charliestarling:

readableposts:

femmecrip:

ateaspoonaday:

One of the most frustrating things is that nobody teaches you how to be disabled.

Everybody teaches you how to try to get better, how to blend in, how to be as normal as possible and “lead a fulfilling life.”

But nobody says the important shit.

There is no 

“Hey, fuck, you’re in a wheelchair and that just sucks balls, but you know what? You gotta fucking do it so here’s some things to make life easier.”

Or “Here’s your new cane! Congrats! Here’s how you use it. Stairs might fuck you up at first but let me show you how to make it easier.”

Or “Hey, you’re autistic, that’s cool. Let me know how I can help as your friend/family. I care.”

No one teaches you, actually teaches you about how to deal with daily life moving forward. 

Once you’re disabled, once people know or once you’re injured or sick or diagnosed or whatever, 

it’s all about pushing to get out of the chair, to stop using the cane, to blend in. 

There is no help to accept your disability and move on with life working with it. 

It’s always a push to work against it in every way possible and that makes it even more exhausting.

God, this! It’s always about trying to ignoring and deny our disability or giving up on us completely. 

It’s like disability is the ultimate failure, even if they won’t say it. 

No one tells you how to make accommodations or what accessibility problems you’ll face.

Disabled people can have quality lives. 

But our lives are going to be different from abled people’s. 

Our health is going to be different. And so should our healthcare. 

But instead we are given the same treatment tailored to abled people, and that means it is going to fail us in so many ways.

This is also why “cure” culture bothers me. 

Because if there’s no cure, doctors give up. It’s like no cure = no available treatment, because why try if we can’t get you back to abled standards?

[caps removed and spaces added for accessibility]

So. Much. This.

fuck this is so relatable right now

I want to make a blog about these things, like finding accessible places, using canes, talking to doctors, ease of dressing, even the emotional stuff and how to deal with that. There’s so little for us spoonies out there in relation to what the hell to do, how to just live with our disability or illness. Would anyone read it?

This post hurts because it’s so true. 

This is why the online spoonie/disability community is so important. I was particularly lucky, because by the time I got sick, my older sister had already been sick for some years (EDS, both us), and so she was able to talk me thru a lot of stuff that she had had to learn by trial and error. How to talk to doctors when my meds weren’t doing enough. How to buy a cane. How to enquire about getting a parking placard. How to get a hip back in socket. Etc etc etc.

I’ve also found tons of good advice here on tumblr, or been able to go to blogs like @spooniestrong to ask others for help. It would be amazing to have a blog dedicated just to tricks of the trade, but that might also be a lot of work for a single person/few people. Maybe there’s a tag to talk about this stuff specifically? (Or we could make one if there isn’t already)