So if “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” is be believed, you can fiddle duel the devil for your soul. My question is, does it only work with fiddles, or any contest? Saxophone duel? Guitar shred-off? Can you challenge the devil to a rap battle when he comes for you?
Even though I play piano I want to see someone fight for their soul with the tuba.
The Devil went back to Georgia and his thoughts were dark and cold That Johnny kid had screwed him and he still needed a soul. When he came across this young man blowin’ on a tuba and playin’ hits And the devil took one look and said “You know what? Fuck this shit.”
“Kid, I know you won’t believe this, but I play the tuba too “And if you wanna wager, well I’ve got a deal for you “If I’m the better tubist, then I get to take your soul “If you’re the best, you get this horn here, made from solid gold.”
The boy replied, “My name is Hans, and though it may be wrong, “Your bet’s pretty intriguing, so I guess I’ll play along”
Hans, clean out your spit valves, and get ready for a show, Two tubas feudin’ face to face; pick up your horn and blow. ‘Cause if you win, you get a brand new tuba made of gold, And if you lose the Devil gets your soul!
(Oompah music intensifies)
The Devil opened up his case and said, “I’ll start, I guess.” And fire puffed out from the bell as on the valves he pressed He raised the mouthpiece to his lips, it made a wicked BLART And a band of lederhosen demons joined in with him to start
(Roll Out the Barrel plays with extended tuba solo)
Hans looked the Devil in the eye, once he finished his piece, Said “That’s okay, old man, but just you get a load of this!”
The Devil bowed his head, because he knew he can’t compete. He dragged that heavy tuba down; it crashed by Hans’s feet. He turned away from Hans and as he retreated he said, “Forget this crap. I’m gonna try telemarketing instead.”
(Tuba outro)
@hamstergal you are amazing and owe me 1 clean monitor.
people are always like “birds are so everyday but sometimes you can really tell theyre descended from dinosaurs” but like ,
have you ever paid really close attention to birds?? birds are like fifty times more weird and fucked up than what we know about the vast majority of dinosaurs. dinosaurs seem like they were more or less regular animals except big. birds are like horrible little aliens. like. people act like birds are normal but geese have teeth on their tongues and ducks have corkscrew genitals and woodpeckers have retractable prehensile tongues that they keep in their nostrils and hoatzins are hatched with fingers on their wings that drop off as they mature and that’s just, like, the stuff that’s unusual for birds? not even just the stuff that birds come with as standard, which i promise you is universally just as bad, honestly, like, have you ever taken a good look at feathers???? theyre fucked up. bird legs? fucked up. birds flapping their wings like huge weird bugs? FUCKED UP
BEAKS? WHAT THE HELL HONESTLY
like, i will acknowledge that for example many mammals are completely fucking ridiculous, like, for example, moles, moles are awful, but thats just one kind of mammal. same with reptiles, tortoises are extremely messed up but most reptiles are basically animal shaped? whereas, birds are universally horrifying. i think about this every time i spend half an hour kissing my bird on the head.
new rule: youre not allowed to reblog this post and tag it “i hate birds”. youre only allowed to reblog this post if you love birds and cherish them and want to be their friend
everything I’ve learned from the BBC and various books growing up tells me that nothing happens at Oxford and Cambridge except murders, secret societies, homosexual longing and possibly the occasional orgy (which begins in homosexual longing and ends in someone being murdered)
Also spies. Sometimes there are gay spy orgies with or without murder.
And it would be so terribly gauche to confuse those last two, to go and really let your hair down at the gay spy orgy only to be caught out by the sudden murdering. ‘I dare say old bean, this is a bit of an outrage,’ you would attest, manhandling erotically sticky corpses out of the way. ‘Terribly bad form.’
except murders, secret societies, homosexual longing and possibly the occasional orgy (which begins in homosexual longing and ends in someone being murdered), spies, and propelling shallow flat-bottomed river craft with 14-ft poles while dispensing brittle witticisms through a curtain of fair, floppy hair
I love how Harry just genuinely likes Luna. Not in a romantic way, but in a “I don’t know how or why but I get you and you get me and I’d be honored to call you a friend and if anyone messes with you I’ll wallop them” kind of a way. I think he just marvels at her level of don’t give a fuck and her absolute sense of self. And then he and Ginny partially name their daughter after her (Lily Luna) and that to me is just fucking precious.
You have to at least ship their friendship.
It’s because Luna leaves him alone. Harry feels upset? Luna talks about her newest theory on whatever magical creature she believes exists. He feels down and depressed? Luna distracts him by talking about Amazon river spirits. Luna gives Harry what he needs, in that she reminds him he is not the center of the universe. That’s what he wants. Harry never wanted to be the savior of the Wizarding World. He never wanted any of it, and he hates that his parents died for a prophecy about him, and he hates thinking about his miserable childhood.
Everyone else keeps accidentally reminding Harry of who he has to be.
Luna is so absorbed in knowing she never once cares about his name as a legend. He’s Harry, her nice friend who holds her shoes for her when she wants to walk barefoot in the woods so she doesn’t startle the moss-people.And he never complains about her oddities, like so many people, and she appreciates that. And for him, she’s Luna, the friend who just needs him to hold her shoes for her. Luna never wants anything from him but for Harry to hold her things and listen to her talk and give his own input to her theories, mad as they might be at times. When Harry is with Luna, it’s always these quiet, content moments. She’s a bit mad, yeah, but she gets him. And he gets her.
Harry will fight anyone who calls her “Loony Lovegood”. Even though she doesn’t care, he does.
Well, here we are, finally at the end of my decongestant-fueled, action figured-aided jaunt through A Midsummer Night’s Dream. If you’re just joining us, get caught up on Episodes One, Two, Three, Four, Five, and Six of the Rude Galacticals’ misadventures in amateur dramatics.
Thanks for putting up with this somewhat meandering tangent. People seemed to really like this series, and I must admit I had quite a bit of fun putting it together, so there might be more action figure comics in the future. After all, now I can’t let my Lord of the Rings action figures feel like they’re being excluded from all the fun….
Kimchi and Justice 