Tag: a fedoration of nice guys

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

chaoticproximity:

yournewfriendshouse:

zinglebert-bembledack:

agoodcartoon:

digitaldiscipline:

magistrate-of-mediocrity:

dr-archeville:

bogleech:

kramergate:

micspam:

ghostsnif:

sciencevevo:

agoodcartoon:

Guys who complain about the friendzone often don’t care about their female friends’ personal boundaries, forcing their female friends build more walls up. A good cartoon.

– submitted by Gene

why is he tearing down a wall with an axe

i hate it when your put in the friendzone and made to tear down a wall

Mr. Gorbachev…tear down this friendzone

how you gonna draw some shit that makes you look like Jack Nicholson in The Shining and still feel like you’re the victim

I DON’T *CHOP* UNDERSTAND *CHOP* WHY *CHOP* YOU CAN’T *CHOP* JUST *CHOP* LET ME *CHOP* BONE YOU *CHOP* ON AN INDEFINITE *CHOP* EXCLUSIVE *CHOP* BASIS *CHOP* WHEN *CHOP* I’M *CHOP* SO *CHOP* NIIIIIIIIIIIICE *CHOP*

“I’m going to wall you up now, Fortunato.”

“Ha ha, and then what? 😉 ”

“For the love of God, Montresor!”
-Cask of Amontifriendzone, Edgar Allan Poe

Incessantly, I heard a smacking,
as of some entitled dipshit whacking,
whacking on my chamber door.

Resignedly, I placed another layer,
voicing a quiet, repeated prayer,
“This dude thinks he’s a player,
but I am not a point to score,
he should fuck off and bother me no more.”

Quoth the friendzoned, “Fucking whore.”

– The Craven, by Edward Allen Bro

edgar allen bro

Oh my god

holy shit

This gets better every time.

(Tips hat)

M’ontresor

This Vote Is Legally Binding

tkingfisher:

In response to all those articles about talking to women with headphones…

Someone always says it, whenever it comes up:
“I guess I’m just not allowed to talk to anyone any more!”

Well.
Yes.
It is my duty to inform you that we took a vote
all us women
and determined that you are not allowed to talk to anyone
ever again.

This vote is legally binding.

Yes, of course, all women know each other,
the way you always suspected.
(Incidentally, so do Canadians. I’m just throwing that out there.)
We went into the women’s room at the Applebee’s at the corner of 54
and all the others streamed in through the doors
into that endless liminal space,
a chain of humans stretching backward
heavy skulled Neanderthal women laughing with New York socialites,
Lucille Ball hand in hand with the Taung child.
We sat around in the couches in the women’s room
(I know you’ve always been suspicious of those couches)
and chatted with each other in the secret female language
that you always knew existed.
Somebody set up a console–
the Empress Wu is ruthless at Mario Kart
and Cleopatra never learned to lose
and a woman who ruled an empire that fell
when the Sea People came
and left no trace
can use the blue shell like a surgical instrument.

Eventually we took the vote.
You had three defenders:
your grandmother and your first-grade teacher
and an Albanian nun who believes the best of everybody.
Your mom abstained.
It was duly recorded in the secret notebooks
that have been kept under the couch in the Applebee’s
since the beginning of recorded time.
And then we went back to playing Mario Kart
and Hoelun took off her bra
and we didn’t think about you again
except that I had to carry this message.

So anyway
good luck with that
it’s just as you always said it was.
Hush now,
no talking

hush.

theactualcluegirl:

animatedamerican:

theragnarokd:

spanishskulduggery:

barbotrobot:

spanishskulduggery:

footybedsheets:

When men’s toxic behaviour transcends language.

In Spanish it’s machoplantear which is a combination of macho “male” and plantear(se) “to lay out (an idea) / to consider”

We could have had hombrexplicar [hombre “man” + explicar “to explain”] and I’m not sure why we didn’t? Some peopple disagree over which is better.

The noun form is el machoplanteamiento “mansplaining”

My guess is“hombrexplicar” doesn’t capture the critique of “machismo” in quite as pointed a way; that is, “machoplantear” points directly at the problem/the term already generally used to discuss problems of masculinity.

Anyway, I’m delighted by all of this.

You make a very good point

in hebrew it’s הסגברה / hasgvara – basically a mashup of hasbara (explaining, but also carries the implication of ‘propaganda’) and gever = man

this is the best thing I have seen all week 😀

This needs more languages.

Whats a fuck boy? i’ve heard many meanings but I want the exact one.

whoisjfx316:

rubyreed:

mattjosephdiaz-blog:

A fuckboy is a weakass dude who ain’t shit.

A fuckboy is the guy who will go around calling women “thirsty hoes” but like 30 profile pictures in a row and comment “hot” under one of them because he thinks somehow it’ll get him laid.

A fuckboy is the guy who calls girls sluts but goes around begging chicks for nudes out of fucking nowhere.

A fuckboy is the guy who sends unrequested dick pics with no context to women he’s barely spoken to.

A fuckboy is a guy who regularly uses phrases like “bros before hoes”

A fuckboy is a guy whose idea of flirting is “what would u do if i was there right now lol” 

A fuckboy can often be spotted by his asking if you want to play “the 21 questions game” which is a trap to ask if you’re a virgin or not

A fuckboy is a guy who will call you a prude if you don’t want to fuck anyone, but call you a slut if you want to fuck someone who isn’t him.

A fuckboy is a guy who will disrespect you and try and get with you in the same breath.

A fuckboy is a guy whose idea of foreplay is kind of touching your clit twice before he tries to move on to sex

A fuckboy is a guy who tries to text you even when he already has a girl

A fuckboy is a guy who continues to hit on you even when you’ve said no

A fuckboy is a guy who pretend to invite you over for “Netflix and pizza” which is a bummer because it’s totally ruined legitimately inviting people over for Netflix and pizza

A fuckboy is any guy who’s ever told you “smile, beautiful” while you’re just walking down the street minding your own fucking business

A fuckboy is the kind of guy you have to lie about having a boyfriend to in order to get him to leave you alone.

A fuckboy is a guy who will tell you “you’re not like the other girls” like that’s a compliment because he doesn’t have any respect for them.

A fuckboy is a guy who will tell you “my exes were all crazy” even though you know them to be totally fine, kind, measured people.

A fuckboy is a guy who will tell you “guys don’t like it when you -bullshit bullshit bullshit-” and try to shame you because of your weight, hair, style, use of makeup or anything else that you do in order to express yourself because in their tiny fuckboy minds you only exist to attract them.

This is a beautiful manifesto. Bless you and bless this post. 

Ladies, looks like you have the blueprint now. Kinda no excuse to deal with any of those shitheads anymore.

A fuckboy is a guy who reads a list of descriptions of fuckboy characteristics and immediately places all responsibility on women to avoid men who act like that, rather than on men to not be fuckboys.

bramblepatch:

leagueofaveragefolk:

bramblepatch:

guys whine about being “beta males” like no shit most people would rather wait for the stable release than fight with your unspeakably broken user interface and that weird glitch where you clip through a wall and end up in the friend zone

Guess that would make alpha males where they don’t have the textures finished yet, so it’s all primary colors with no shading or nuance.

I mean

I feel like that’s a pretty good description of a guy in a polo shirt

arcana-corvus:

rabbureblogs:

spazzeon:

How come “nice guys” say M’lady but wear fedoras?

If you’re saying M’lady you should be wearing tights and a neck ruffle. If you’re wearing a fedora you should be saying like… see here and dame. Classy fedora dudes never said M’lady. Wtf.

And why do they always have katanas? There’s like 5 different time periods in this horrible trope.

This entire post makes me laugh

M’anachronism