So if “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” is be believed, you can fiddle duel the devil for your soul. My question is, does it only work with fiddles, or any contest? Saxophone duel? Guitar shred-off? Can you challenge the devil to a rap battle when he comes for you?
Even though I play piano I want to see someone fight for their soul with the tuba.
The Devil went back to Georgia and his thoughts were dark and cold That Johnny kid had screwed him and he still needed a soul. When he came across this young man blowin’ on a tuba and playin’ hits And the devil took one look and said “You know what? Fuck this shit.”
“Kid, I know you won’t believe this, but I play the tuba too “And if you wanna wager, well I’ve got a deal for you “If I’m the better tubist, then I get to take your soul “If you’re the best, you get this horn here, made from solid gold.”
The boy replied, “My name is Hans, and though it may be wrong, “Your bet’s pretty intriguing, so I guess I’ll play along”
Hans, clean out your spit valves, and get ready for a show, Two tubas feudin’ face to face; pick up your horn and blow. ‘Cause if you win, you get a brand new tuba made of gold, And if you lose the Devil gets your soul!
(Oompah music intensifies)
The Devil opened up his case and said, “I’ll start, I guess.” And fire puffed out from the bell as on the valves he pressed He raised the mouthpiece to his lips, it made a wicked BLART And a band of lederhosen demons joined in with him to start
(Roll Out the Barrel plays with extended tuba solo)
Hans looked the Devil in the eye, once he finished his piece, Said “That’s okay, old man, but just you get a load of this!”
The Devil bowed his head, because he knew he can’t compete. He dragged that heavy tuba down; it crashed by Hans’s feet. He turned away from Hans and as he retreated he said, “Forget this crap. I’m gonna try telemarketing instead.”
(Tuba outro)
@hamstergal you are amazing and owe me 1 clean monitor.
everything I’ve learned from the BBC and various books growing up tells me that nothing happens at Oxford and Cambridge except murders, secret societies, homosexual longing and possibly the occasional orgy (which begins in homosexual longing and ends in someone being murdered)
Also spies. Sometimes there are gay spy orgies with or without murder.
And it would be so terribly gauche to confuse those last two, to go and really let your hair down at the gay spy orgy only to be caught out by the sudden murdering. ‘I dare say old bean, this is a bit of an outrage,’ you would attest, manhandling erotically sticky corpses out of the way. ‘Terribly bad form.’
except murders, secret societies, homosexual longing and possibly the occasional orgy (which begins in homosexual longing and ends in someone being murdered), spies, and propelling shallow flat-bottomed river craft with 14-ft poles while dispensing brittle witticisms through a curtain of fair, floppy hair
Random Headcanon: That Federation vessels in Star Trek seem to experience bizarre malfunctions with such overwhelming frequency isn’t just an artefact of the television serial format. Rather, it’s because the Federation as a culture are a bunch of deranged hyper-neophiles,
tooling around in ships packed full of beyond-cutting-edge tech they
don’t really understand. Endlessly frustrating if you have to fight
them, because they can pull an effectively unlimited number of bullshit
space-magic countermeasures out of their arses – but they’re as likely
as not to give themselves a lethal five-dimensional wedgie in the
process. All those rampant holograms and warp core malfunctions and
accidentally-traveling-back-in-time incidents? That doesn’t actually
happen to anyone else; it’s literally just Federation vessels that go off the rails like that. And they do so on a fairly regular basis.
So to everyone else in the galaxy, all humans are basically Doc Brown.
Aliens who have seen the Back to the Future movies literally don’t realise that Doc Brown is meant to be funny. They’re just like “yes, that is exactly what all human scientists are like in my experience”.
THE ONLY REASON SCOTTY IS CHIEF ENGINEER INSTEAD OF SOMEONE FROM A SPECIES WITH A HIGHER TECHNOLOGICAL APTITUDE IS BECAUSE EVERYONE FROM THOSE SPECIES TOOK ONE LOOK AT THE ENTERPRISE’S ENGINE ROOM AND RAN AWAY SCREAMING
vulcan science academy: why do you need another warp core
humans: we’re going to plug two of them together and see if we go twice as fast
vsa: last time we gave you a warp core you threw it into a sun to see if the sun would go twice as fast
haribo can make as many cute ads as they want, don’t think I’ll ever eat their gummy bears after reading that eBay review where all those people shit their guts out after eating them
This Kotaku article chronicles how fans of Crusader Kings II – an incredibly interesting and complex medieval political simulator – managed to find an exploit in the game that allows players to create a dynasty of horses. Like, giddy-up-giddy-up-let’s-go horses.
Long story short: the devs, as a joke, inserted a horse councillor into the game who can’t do basically anything. Unless you nominate him to be bishop, and find a way to kill off the current bishop. Once the horse takes control of the church, they magically become able to get married and create heirs.
Long story even shorter: One player managed to restore the Roman Empire using nothing but horses.
I have no idea who Scalia was. Isn’t that the thing that people call themselves when they are furries but with reptiles?
You’re thinking of scalies. Scalia is a quantity that has magnitude but not direction.
You’re thinking of scalars. Scalia is an opera house in Milan.
You’re thinking of La Scala. Scalia is is a form of thermal burn resulted from heated fluids such as boiling water or steam.
You’re thinking of scalding. Scalia are subjective internal experiences.
You’re thinking of qualia. Scalia is the region of Northern Europe consisting mainly of Norway, Sweden, and Finland.
You’re thinking of Scandinavia. Scalia is a company that makes trucks.
You’re thinking of Scania. Scalia is a a wizard and a Snatcher in the gang led by Fenrir Greyback in the Harry Potter universe.
You’re thinking of Scabior. Scalia was the guise assumed by Peter Pettigrew in his capacity as an Animagus,also in the Harry Potter universe.
You’re thinking of Scabbers. Scalia is a type of triangle where no two sides have the same length.
You’re thinking of Scalene. A Scalia is a method of stealing people’s valuables or money through elaborate falsehoods, deception and acting.
you’re thinking of scams. scalia is the bone that connects the humerus to the clavicle.
You’re thinking of scapula. Scalia is a small knife with a thin, sharp blade that is used in surgeries and dissections.
You’re thinking of a scalpel.Scalia is an abnormal lateral curvature of the spine.
You’re thinking of scoliosis. Scalia is the author of “Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.”
You’re thinking of a Scamander. Scalia is a flat tool used for flipping food.
You’re thinking of a spatula. Scalia is any one of numerous species of saltwater clams or marine bivalve mollusks in the taxonomic family Pectinidae.
You’re thinking of a scallop. Scalia is the eighth astrological sign in the tropic Zodiac, and one of the three water signs, along with Cancer and Pisces.
You’re thinking of Scorpio… Scalia is a vegetable in the onion family, with long green stalks, usually added to a dish for flavor.
You’re thinking of scallion. Scalia is the ship name for Scott McCall and Malia Tate from Teen Wolf.
You’re thinking of Scott/Malia. Scalia is the primary antagonist in the He-Man cartoons. He wants to seize control of Castle Grayskull, the cultural and political stronghold of Eternia, so that he can conquer the universe and shape it to accord with his own evil vision.
You’re thinking of Skeletor. Scalia is a method of using oars to propel watercraft. In modern crew competitions, it refers to two-oared rowing.
You’re thinking of sculling. Scalia are green-skinned, shape-shifting antagonists in the Marvel comic universe.
Hamilton was not content to write [under the pseudonym] Camillus alone. Two days after his second essay appeared, he began to publish, in the same paper, a parallel series as ‘Philo Camillus.’ For several weeks, Philo Camillus indulged in extravagant praise of Camillus and kept up a running attack on their republican adversaries. The prolific Hamilton was now writing pseudonymous commentaries on his own pseudonymous essays. He also tossed in two trenchant essays under the name ‘Horatius’ in which he accused Jeffersonians of ‘a servile and criminal subserviency to the views of France.’
Ron Chernow, Alexander Hamilton
alexander hamilton joined a forum and created multiple accounts so he could agree with himself in a political discussion thread
The Catatumbo Lightning is an atmospheric phenomenon in Venezuela. For ten hours a night, up to 160 nights per year, lightening lights up the entire sky.
Kimchi and Justice 