Tag: bahahahaha

INTERVIEWER
I read you had trouble with the editing of the British Penguin edition of Anna Karenina.
VOLOKHONSKY
They hated what we did.
PEVEAR
It was quite something. For example, Vronsky meets Anna on the railroad coming to Moscow. He says, “Did you come recently?” And the copy-editor wrote a comment which said, “I’m not sure if you’re aware of it, but this word now has acquired different meanings.” And there is better! Kitty is discussing the upcoming ball. Seventeen-year-old, completely innocent Kitty says, “I do like balls.” Again the copy editor wrote, “I’m not sure if you’re aware …” Then the editor had this other problem. I had written Anna “got into the carriage.” And the editor said, this is the American usage of the word “got”. We can’t do this in a British edition. You should say Anna “went” into the carriage. I wrote back, “I’m not sure if you’re aware of it, but this word has now acquired different meanings . . . ”

Excerpt from

Paris Review interview

with Russian translation team Larissa Volokhonsky and Richard Pevear (there’s a different, and longer, snippet here.)

Dat reply. :3

(via aristoteliancomplacency)

i find myself compelled to ask what, on this drunkenness scale that goes from one to toaster, is in between one and toaster. INQUIRING MINDS, ETC.

leupagus:

You ask a wise and penetrating question, my good friend, and so I shall share with you the Gus Scale of Drunk, which I have devised over the course of decades, with the assistance of many (many, many MANY) friends and family members who have answered my query “hey on a scale of one to ten just how drunk are you right now?”

  1. One
  2. Two
  3. Three
  4. Four
  5. Five
  6. Six
  7. Seven
  8. Eight
  9. Nine
  10. Ten
  11. Eleven
  12. Thirteen probably or something
  13. It’s cool I’ve got superpowers
  14. What?
  15. Seventeen
  16. Shhhhh, no
  17. [loud burp]
  18. Uh
  19. Hey where’s my purse
  20. Hey where’s my phone
  21. Hey where’re my shoes
  22. Hey what’s happening
  23. WHAT?
  24. Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy what?
  25. [any song referencing moonlight, solitude/loneliness, or body parts (ie “Light My Candle,” from Rent, “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” by Green Day, or “Hips Don’t Lie” by Shakira]
  26. TWENTYONEDRUNK BITCHES
  27. [immediate vomiting]
  28. I’m a great drunk driver don’t even worry about it
  29. Who are you. [spoken like a statement, not a question]
  30. great
  31. GREAT!
  32. great [followed by sobbing]
  33. No you are
  34. if I chew the beer does it make me fat
  35. [long, incredibly thoughtful monologue about how elephants have been known to seek out fermented fruit and eat it in order to achieve intoxication, followed by] oh my god did you cry when you saw Dumbo I cried so fuckin’ hard
  36. A million
  37. A million and one
  38. [attempting to poke my boobs with a drink stirrer]
  39. Ffffffffffffffffff
  40. Ffffffffffffffffffwhat?
  41. nope
  42. we should go skydiving RIGHT FUCKING NOW OKAY
  43. wheeeeeee! [zooming an imaginary toy car off someone else’s nose]
  44. You know – YOU KNOW, OKAY, SO, MAYBE? I DON’T
  45. billions
  46. [some French children’s song about elephants]
  47. WOULD YOU LIKE SOME OF THESE PEANUTS
  48. noooooooooooooooooope
  49. [snoring]
  50. toaster

asha-fallenangel-risingdemon:

the-cuddly-punk:

neenya:

doubleohmogar:

franerys:

katiebpeters:

chloereneeeee:

How many altos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they can’t get that high.

How many sopranos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One, she holds it up and waits for the world to revolve around her.

How many singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. An alto to actually do it and a soprano to stand by and ask “isn’t that a little high for you?”

u wanna fucking go

here for this fight

image

How do you know a soprano is at your door?

She can’t find the key and doesn’t know where to come in

OOOOOOOO

jazzcatte:

feministroosterteeth:

top-hats-from-cereal-boxes:

ironicdavestrider:

sunsetfucker:

fabledfrowningfox:

The English language cannot support 100+ new pronouns added all at once, especially when many of those pronouns are exactly like words that already exist.

no one cares lol

OP is just upset that their pronouns are boring

I’m an engineering student and I can assure you that the English language can in fact support significantly more than 100 new pronouns at once, due to its tensile strength of “being a fucking concept and not a physical material”

the great language war ended when the 101st pronoun was added. with a great crack, language broke in half, sending all words into the abyss. civilisation as we knew it disintegrated, people could only communicate in grunts. if only we hadn’t added that last pronoun.

fun fact the tower of babel was constructed entirely out of pronouns

film fact of the day

prisonplanetofficial:

the-chemical-defect:

prisonplanetofficial:

ycontuespiritu:

heltoniusbk:

peejaymc:

ycontuespiritu:

The Smiths aren’t a real band. Zooey Deschanel was supposed to say “I love Radiohead” during the elevator scene of 500 Days of Summer, but she forgot her line and improvised the name “The Smiths”. the music heard in the movie by this make-believe band was provided by Pavement.

Wrong.

The Smiths are an 80s post punk/alternative band fronted by Morrisey. You might have heard of a little tune called How Soon is Now.
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Smiths

http://youtu.be/hnpILIIo9ek

You’re welcome.

Got served.

thanks fellas

Initially the film’s producers put up a small Wikipedia article to give the impression that the smiths had existed but after the movie became a hit fans began filling in the backstory. Everything you know about the smiths and this Morrissey character is an elaborate patchwork of fanfiction, which is why Morrissey appears to contradict himself so often

http://www.allmusic.com/artist/the-smiths-mn0000899530
Um no, they’re a real band

I’m afraid not. Don’t believe everything you read on the Internet