When autistic people talk about not wanting to be changed, we’re not talking about wanting to remain static and unchanging throughout time…We’re saying “We don’t want to be changed” in the same way that a cat, faced with becoming a dog, would say “I don’t want to be changed.” The cat isn’t denying the important passage from kittenhood to adulthood. The cat is saying I want to grow as a cat, not a dog.

Mel Baggs, “What not changing us means” (via neurodiversitysci)

It is so weird when I read something and I’m going “Wow, right, that’s totally accurate,” and then I read down to the attribution and it’s something I had written ages ago and completely forgotten about.

(via withasmoothroundstone)

signs of a shutdown in autistic people

autisticpearl:

euryale-dreams:

admiraldefiant:

autisticdrift:

  • Becoming less verbal or nonverbal
  • Looking “spaced out” or detached from what’s happening 
  • Withdrawing, not wanting to be around people
  • Curling up in the fetal position
  • Hiding out under furniture, blankets, etc. 

And no, person observing above-mentioned signs, there’s nothing you can do to help. Except go away.

The “go away” bit is good for making a point, since it points out that not intervening is better than trying to intervene and making things worse. That said – some things drawn from my own experience:

  • As a few other posters have said, if the person shutting down is in a crowded, noisy, or otherwise threatening place, remove them to somewhere calmer and safer. Be gentle, since physical contact can make sensory overload worse.
  • Try not to ask too many difficult questions (and please do not ask them anything that could wait until later). Being in a shut down often makes executive dysfunction or language processing issues worse; even simple yes-or-no questions can be difficult to handle, either because it is frustrating to process the words, or to make a decision. Do not assume that they haven’t heard you if they don’t respond immediately.
  • I, personally, tend to be more prone to withdrawing or becoming irritable when I haven’t had food lately. If you know the person in question well enough to evaluate this, take this into consideration. The one question that’s always welcome to me is “do you want food?”. Not “have you eaten lately?” (requires memory + categorization), and not “what can I get you?” (requires decision making).

Most importantly: Do not trivialize or try to blame them for what is happening. This is severely damaging toward trust, and if an autistic person has a bad experience with you while they’re experiencing a meltdown or other episode, they may no longer feel safe around you. Your presence may make a subsequent episode worse if they have a bad history with you. If you suspect you’re not capable of responding apffpropriately (and if you are neurotypical and don’t know the person in question very well, you are in this category by default!), it is a wiser choice to leave.

By far the most important thing you can do to support an autistic friend who is having a shutdown is to have talked with this person before they experience a shutdown so that you have a plan in place and both of you understand what to expect in case of emergency. Do this when you both feel emotionally safe. Discuss your plans on a regular basis to reinforce your own preparedness and to reinforce a sense of predictability and security in your friend.

Basically, treat your friend like a human being rather than as a generic cluster of symptoms. Don’t interact with them in a way that is dictated by their diagnosis. Instead, ask them what they need from you, as an individual.

also some indicators that an autistic person is shutting down:

  • signs that their auditory processing isn’t working as well as it typically does, including frequently asking for things to be repeated for clarification (obviously the context matters with this one–if this is in a loud room or a room with several noises going on at once/if it’s a situation where most people would do this, then it’s likely not a sign of a shutdown, especially if no other signs are present)
  • not being able to give clear answers (ex. more frequent use of “i don’t know/care/understand”)
  • more difficulty processing what they’re seeing than is usual (can’t think of indicators of this)
  • having a harder time/not being able to read
  • basically anything indicating that their processing isn’t working as well as usual
  • obvious signs of increased anxiety/distress (rapid stimming, concerning expressions–looking expressionless, teary, angry, and/or frustrated, getting easily frustrated, unusual tone of voice/speech patterns)

most of these are signs i (sometimes) recognize in myself when i’m close to shutting down

and it’s important to remember that a couple of these doesn’t necessarily mean someone is shutting down, especially considering these should be changes and not just what’s typical for the person in question (ex. having constant problems processing audio)

some people also have individualized indicators, which you can find out by (as the previous commenter suggested) talking to/asking them

and if an autistic person tells you that they’re close to a shutdown or meltdown and they need something (to be somewhere with less stimulation, food/liquids, something to stim with, etc.) but they aren’t showing any signs of it, believe them anyway

some of us are very good at hiding these signs (sometimes without even realizing it) for the sake of passing as neurotypical (even if the situation doesn’t call for that), and taking our word for it/listing to us in order to help us through a shutdown or meltdown is the best thing you can do in these situations

tinybrush:

Stim with pride, friends 🙂

UPDATE: This illustration is now available through deviantart as a little 4×6 print, a postcard or a magnet. You can find it here!

Image shows two women smiling at each other.  The one on the left is flapping her hands vigorously, the one on the right is standing still.  Text reads “When it comes to expressing happiness there are no wrong ways.”

Autism Acceptance Activity Ideas for Americans

iamthethunder:

  • Register to vote.
  • Do something fun with an autistic child.
  • Find out whether your state legislature will make any decisions about disability issues in the near future.
  • Go out with other disabled adults.  Take selfies.
  • Tell one person who did not know that you are autistic.
  • Find out if there is anything you can do for your local special education or inclusive classroom teachers.
  • Look up what positions, if any, your senators and representatives have on disability issues.
  • Join or donate to a good disability organization.
  • Teach an autistic child how to do something or about a subject you know well.
  • Visit a disabled adult who might be isolated.
  • If you can drive, help someone who cannot run an important errand.
  • Help teens and adults who are disabled and poor get library cards.
  • Help autistics who seem dissatisfied with their means of communication look for better ones.
  • Invite autistic adults to come and visit you.  Talk about disability issues or just watch a movie.
  • Sign up to receive emailed action alerts from the major autism and disability organizations.