Tag: yes I’m stretching the tag i don’t care

five-bi-five:

jewish-privilege:

animatedamerican:

withbloodinherteeth:

slagarthefox:

amemait:

just-shower-thoughts:

There is no biblical evidence that Jesus even knew how to parallel park. Letting him take the wheel seems a bit irresponsible.

Uh, no, you’re so wrong? Everybody knows that Jesus drove a Honda, but he didn’t like to talk about it?

From John 12:49 ‘For I do not speak of my own Accord…’

That is brilliant and this post is an example of the right way to do religious jokes are are actually funny without being preachy nor offensive. 

prosperosfootnotes, pieandhotdogs

Maybe Jesus didn’t like to talk about it because it wasn’t the same kind of car as his Dad’s.

Because as we all know, God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in His Fury.

Nah, clearly God drives Dodge pickup trucks, because Moshe’s people are told not to approach the mountain “until the Ram’s horn sounds a long blast” -Exodus 19:13. 

fUCK YOU ALL

spacevinci:

fuckyeahsexpositivity:

peppermintfeminist:

katodown:

agnellina:

grantaire-put-that-bottle-down:

hey there LGBTQ kids who are also Christian/Jewish! If you feel like you’re disobeying God, questioning your faith, or feel wrong and dirty for loving who you love, there’s this fantastic site I found today called hoperemains that accurately and thoroughly combs through scripture and its (many) mistranslations, validates your orientation, and basically let’s you know that you’re not pissing off God. It’s insanely thorough and after reading through every page on the entire site it’s super helpful. Go check it out!

No no no! Jewish LGBTQ kinderlach! Go to Keshet! 

hoperemains is completely from a Christian perspective, and not pluralistic or interfaith at all.

If you reblogged the first post from me please reblog this amendment so the Jewish peeps can access this resource too! 

Trans Jewish kids, you can go to TransTorah as well!

Muslim LGBTQ kids, you can go to iamnotharaam! It’s run by a mod squad of different genders and orientations, and they take submissions from everybody!

–BB

MAY ANYONE WHO REBLOGS THIS BE ELEVATED TO THE EQUIVALENT OF SAINTHOOD IN THEIR RELIGION BLESS ALL OF YOU OH MY GOD.

literary-potato:

Let’s be honest: Jesus wouldn’t take the wheel. Jesus would let Peter drive, fall asleep in the back seat, wake up to the sound of the other eleven screaming in mortal terror (while Peter bellows expletives at the car in front), and get them out of a fatal car accident at the very last second by rebuking the speed limit.

Mary Magdalene is the madwoman – angry mad – in Christianity’s attic. She was hidden there because of an open and not fully appreciated secret, and its implications, at Christianity’s core: that the male disciples fled and the women did not.

Jane Schaberg, “The Ressurection of Mary Magdalene” (via slaughterofbruce)

The companion is Mary of Magdala. Jesus loved her
more than his students. He kissed her often
on her face, more than all his students,
and they said, “Why do you love her more than us?”
The savior answered, saying to them,
“Why do I not love you like her?“

–The Gospel of Philip